What I Wore Wednesday: Summer dresses

 Hi!  Thanks for stopping by for What I Wore Wednesday, where I link up with The Pleated Poppy and share some of my outfits from the last week.  I had fun with my hair and makeup this weekend, but I kept my outfits pretty simple.  I am realizing I really need more accessories...I should make some, like Ania from Life on The Farm, whose blog I read.  She is so good at making her own headbands and things!

I've had this dress for a few years, and I just picked up some new black leggings from Target, so I added those.  With two little ones, I can't really wear a short dress without something underneath.  Not only am I really active and busy with them, but they lift up my dress about every five minutes if I'm wearing one.

My platform espadrilles are from Old Navy last year.

 This next outfit is my hippie mama outfit, I guess.  At least, that's what I thought of when I saw these pictures.  My hair is in its wild and natural state, which is basically, you know...big!

 I like this outfit until I get to the shoes, which are pretty trashed. The maxi dress and blouse are from Target, the belt is Forever 21 Plus.  I felt super comfortable in this outfit, except that I was so hot with my hair down!  I can't wait for the weather to start cooling off, so I can wear my fall clothes and not worry about sweating everywhere I go.

 Yesterday, I wrote a post about honesty in this blog, and wanting to be more transparent in everything I do and talk about here.  Well, I just wanted to share the following picture, because it shows the real me, what my body really looks like.  Posing can help you look a lot better, but I don't live my life posing. I love taking pictures every week and always trying to look my best in them.  I'm a real person, though.  I'm not always confident with my body, but I think wearing clothes that I love makes me feel like my authentic self, and that adds confidence to everything I do.

I am not a Supermom

I have more Seattle pictures that I want to share, but instead, I thought for this post, I would just...write.  

I wanted to talk about something that has been on mind lately, which is the idea of "supermoms" and bloggers in general.

I...am so not a supermom.

Somewhere in this blogging journey, I feel like I lost my voice a little.  Or maybe a lot.  I started concentrating on what people commented on most, and stopped writing candidly about my life. I've been focusing on the fun things in my life for so long, and trying to avoid being too personal most of the time.

I have struggle with thoughts that no one wants to read a blog about someone who is always fighting to be happy. There are so many  wonderful people and things in my life, yet I still struggle with depression and anxiety.  I get angry and sometimes I scream at my husband.  I lose my cool and get frustrated with the kids, and I don't react the way a supermom would. I drink sometimes, I used to smoke, and I play video games most nights.  I don't create art or cook something fabulous or wear a cute outfit every day.  There have even been days this year when it was a struggle to even get out of bed and function.  

Yet, I still have a beautiful life.  I say this not to boast, but to cement it in my heart.  I have so much.

And I have so much help.  I mean...a lot of help.  I hate to talk about the help that I receive because in a way, I am ashamed to be thirty years old and still relying on other people.  Someone once left a  comment on a post about my dad giving me his camera after I lost mine, and it was something like, 

"Seriously? You are so  @#$%&^  pathetic. Don't you do anything for yourself?"  

I was shocked and felt sick.  How did this person read my mind and know the worst things I think about myself?  How did they know that I am so embarrassed that we aren't standing entirely on our own feet?

Mark and I are both students, and my mom has been watching the kids twice a week for the last two years, while I go to school.  Mark's mom really enjoys being with the kids once a week, so we have another day to do homework and chores and run errands (and sometimes, do nothing.)  Our parents have been so generous with their love, their time and let's face it, have gifted us with so many things and experiences we wouldn't have otherwise.

Some people might look down on us for accepting so much from our parents (and trust me, they don't support us or anything, but they do pay for us when we go on family trips and when we go out to eat and things like that), but I just feel like I need to be authentic.  I need anyone who reads this to know that I am not pulling off this lifestyle all on my own, completely on a student's budget. We're certainly not living a luxurious lifestyle, but I know that we definitely have so much.

My life has been so much more than was has been included in this blog lately.  My life is not vacation after vacation filled with perfect moments and relationships. I second guess myself, and wonder if going to art school and pursuing my education are the right thing for my family.  I feel self-indulgent and guilty sometimes, and sometimes I overcompensate by spoiling my children.  That sucks to say, but it's the truth. 

 I definitely want to open up more in terms of my experience as a mother and wife, which I have somehow neglected, even on a blog with "mom" in the title. I want to really share how I manage our hectic lives without going crazy. I want to share more about what I'm really thinking, instead of "look at how cool this thing I did is!" kind of stuff all the time.  So, I want to start out with honesty.

I want to start out with "I struggle. I fail. I need help, and I take it, except when I don't. I don't always like myself, but I'm trying to change that. I'm really imperfect, and it's hard for me to show that sometimes."  

I hope you'll stick around as I keep all the fashion, recipes and DIY projects AND add in a lot more honest discussion.  I just need to be real.  I already feel so much better, even if I'll never be supermom...if she even exists.

Seattle

It has been a crazy time around our house lately.  I got back from my trip to Seattle around 1:00 in the morning on Tuesday, and then Mark left for a two night fishing trip later that morning.  We saw each other for a little bit before he left, but it was such a tease!  Mark came back late Thursday afternoon, and we have been enjoying time as family again.  The kids are so happy that we're all back together again, and so I am.

My trip to Seattle was so much fun and, at the same time, so weird because I was there without the kids or Mark.  I hadn't been apart from the kids for more than two nights ever, and I went five nights without them.  By Monday, I was so ready to get back to them and snuggle them.  Mark and I were able to text and chat throughout each day, so although I missed him, it was easier to manage for me.

The drive to Seattle was twelve hours each way and it was a looooong drive when you added all of the necessary stops we took.  My friend, Amy, did all of the driving.  I stayed awake every minute of the drive, though and was the official navigator.

I took so many pictures on the trip that I think I'll spread them out over a few posts, like one on just the food I ate and another on all the art I got to see.  I already posted about what I wore on the trip, which you can check out here.

On our first day, we went to the Seattle Center to see the Space Needle, eat lunch and go to the EMP Musuem.  I loved seeing the Space Needle pretty much anywhere you went in town, and it adds a an edgy/futuristic vibe to the whole city.  Seattle might be Pacific Northwest, but you don't really get a hippy vibe from it...more of a rock vibe!

There was so much for a small town girl like me to look at and find interesting.  Even the signs were cool to me, like this awesome car wash sign.  I remember thinking that if we lived here, my kids would probably make me go here just for the sign. It rotated, too!

I had such a great time with Amy and my friend/hostess, Erika.  We walked all over town, saw everything we wanted to see, ate delicious food, drank Framboise, ate candy, stayed up too late and slept in too long, hung out with new friends and laughed until our abs ached and tears ran down our faces.  I felt free.

But, I am so glad that my "freedom" was only temporary.  Everywhere we went, I saw children and families and couples and I was so thankful that I had another life to go home to, a life where I am a wife and a mother.  It was so fun to be away and I am so grateful for the opportunity.  I'm just grateful for my everyday life, too!

All of the tourist-y places were so crowded, which is of course to be expected.  Pike Place Market was just teaming with people, but we were able to spend some time people watching as we enjoyed lunch and a drink.

We spent an afternoon walking along the waterfront, taking pictures, talking, and trying not to get blisters.  We did so much in our short time in Seattle, and I was even able to spend an afternoon with my awesome cousin who I rarely (like never) get to see.

Saying goodbye was hard. I didn't want to leave Erika, whom I feel so much closer to.  We talked, and talked and talked.  And I didn't want to leave Lacey, her sweet rescued Pit Bull who became the fourth gal in our party.  The weather and atmosphere was just so wonderful, and I really felt like I could live there, if my family was with me.  Seattle now holds a special place in my heart.

What I Wore Wednesday- Seattle

 

What a week!  I just returned from Seattle, where I spent four nights staying with a friend. Another friend drove the twelve hour drive it took to get there with me and we all had a wonderful time.  It was so much fun and each day was a different adventure.  I'll share more about the trip in another post, but here's what I wore during my time in Seattle. This is kind of crazy, but somehow all of these clothes are from Target at some point or another.

 

On our first day, we went to the Seattle center (home of the Space Needle and lots of other attractions).  I chose not to go to the top of the Space Needle, but we did go to the EMP museum, which was so fun!

The next day, we headed to Pike Place Market and the Waterfront.  We went sightseeing and ended our time there with a trip to the Sculpture Garden through Seattle Art Museum.

And, just so you know what I really look like, a candid picture:

 

It was so crowded, but so much fun!

I wore the next outfit for an afternoon in West Seattle with my cousin who I visited with for the day.

The next outfit was my road outfit, and it was quite the journey home.  It was so nice to get home after being away from Mark and the kids for so long!  It was crazy to be away from them, but it was amazing to hang out with my amazing friends for the week.

I'm linking up with The Pleated Poppy

On the Road Again

When last semester ended and summer vacation began, I knew we were going to have an awesome time together. I didn't know just how packed and exciting this summer would prove to be, though.  

We've been fortunate enough to have some really fun experiences this summer, like seeing Sesame Street Live, visiting the San Francisco Bay Area with my sister, hanging out with my other sister while she is here with my niece for two weeks and last week, my entire family went to the coast for three nights of fun on the beach. 

We took turns making meals for everyone (14 of us!) and they were all so delicious!

"Mine! Mine! Mine!"

 These two water bugs had so much fun playing in the surf together!

 Liam absolutely loved playing in the sand and talks about the beach every day now.

 Maggie and her cousin Nate love to play together.  They are so sweet to watch!

 I love this picture of Magdalena and her cousin, Amelia.  Amelia is nine months older than Maggie and they play pretend nonstop when they are together.  And they are hilarious.

Tide Pools!

Lots of people checking out the tide pools.

 S'mores at night around the firepit.

This picture of Mark and Liam is one of my favorite pictures ever.  I love those guys.

The rest of the pictures are all from an evening the four of us spent at Glass beach and it was so perfect and magical.  We had a wonderful time looking at all the sea glass.

The beach vacation might be over, but another vacation is starting tomorrow.  For me, at least. The kids and Mark are staying home as I embark on what I see as a great adventure.  I'm going on a 12 hour roadtrip (both ways)  to Seattle with a friend, to stay with a mutual friend of ours for four nights.  We have no definite plans, exceptt to see new things, take lots of pictures and do whatever we want.  I have already expressed my desire to have a cocktail at an inappropriate time and/or place, and to all go somewhere just to sit quietly and draw or paint or heck, just sit quietly. 

Although, with these ladies, I don't think there is going to be too much quiet time.  I expect many more "wet your pants from laughing and breaking into song and dance and hey, let's do impressions" times than quiet times on this trip.  And that makes me happy.  I'm taking my camera and laptop and really hoping I'll be able to blog a little on the trip.  

So, I guess, next time you see me, I'll be in Seattle!  

When Companies Care

A few weeks ago, I wrote this review about our experience taking the kids to go see Sesame Street Live: Elmo Makes Music.  We had a wonderful time, but the snowcones we bought as treats had too much dye in them and hurt their tummies (and made their poop blue for days!)

I wrote a letter to Sesame Street and the Vee Corporation, which runs the live shows for Sesame Street, and detailed our whole experience, with a link to the post.  This is the response I received a couple of days ago form the Vee Corporation:


Thanks very much for writing! We appreciate your show review as well as your concerns. We apologize that the snow cones diminished your live show experience and we take your feedback very seriously.
Although this is the first snow cone complaint we’ve received, we will review how they are being prepared. The negative effects you and your family experienced indicate that too much coloring was added, but please be assured that we only use FDA approved coloring in our products.


They also offered my family four vouchers for next year's show, which was of course, awesome. I accepted them, and I am already looking forward to next year's show. I felt like they really listened to me and care about the adverse effects we experienced.  All I wanted was for someone to take a look at the snowcones and think about the amount of dye that goes in them, and I really believe that someone is going to.

I feel like this really did help to restore the trust I have in Sesame Street as a brand.  Sometimes people, and companies, mess up.  Often times, we feel like the corporations are so big that we don't have a voice, so we don't even bother to speak up. Obviously, some companies still care about their fans and customers, and I am so glad that Sesame Street is one of them.

How to Take an Awkward Family Photo

We've been back from our vacation for a few days, and I'm finally getting around to looking at pictures from the trip and editing them.  We had a wonderful time with my family at the beach.  The kids loved playing in the sand and the surf, and we all loved hanging out at the big house we were all sharing (all 14 of us!)

I found this picture, and thought it was amazing in an oh-so-awkward way.

 In case you can't pinpoint exactly what makes it so perfectly awkward, I broke it down for you.  And it had so much potential to be a great picture.  I'm still hanging it somewhere, though.  I love it.

I'm writing another post all about our trip with lots more pictures, plus I have some more art and DIY projects to share with you all this week.  Talk soon!

Liam's Pictures

I found some pictures on my camera the other day and I didn't know how they got there.

Until I saw the feet of a tiny photographer.

I love seeing what the kids take pictures of when they are given the chance. 

In this case; animals...and feet.

I love that little guy.

What I Wore Wednesday

Hi, all!

I'm linking up with The Pleated Poppy for another week of What I Wore Wednesday to share my outfits from the last week.  I only have one, because we all got the flu and I didn't get out of my jammies after that!

Here's my Fourth of July, which I put together by reworking some of my clothes.  I actually was tired of this too baggy Forever 21 navy v-neck, so I cut it straight down the middle, then sewed it back together in a more flattering way, and attached a fabric flower I made.  My striped skirt is actually a mini dress I usually wear as a tank top, but I just pulled it down to my waist.  Instant skirt!

I paired the outfit with my brown boots from Target, and I felt stylish, comfy and ready for our little July 4th BBQ.

I topped it off (literally!) with two braids that I pinned around my head.  It was so simple and I love how it kept my hair totally off of my neck.

We're on vacation and having an amazing time at the beach with my whole family (all 14 of us!)  I can't wait to share some of my beachy outfits with you all next week!

Six Years of Marriage

Six years ago today, I said "I do" to this man.

I had a mushy post written about how much I love him and all that.

But, I think you can get that by just looking at these pictures we took last year for our fifth anniversary.

Let me tell you what it's really like to be married to Mark.

Mark is a deep sleeper, but sometimes he will just wake up, jump out of bed and (this is where it gets weird) basically sleepwalk to the kitchen and start eating.  He's not exactly asleep, and will talk and everything, but he'll go right back to sleep afterwards.  He'll just walk into the kitchen or pantry, grab handfuls of whatever or chug a drink, and then walk back, get right back into bed and then start snoring again. He always remembers everything and is probably awake, but it's just a weird thing of his. And I know this isn't healthy, but he rarely does it anymore, so we haven't really worried about it. You know, 'cause ignoring something is way easier than taking care of it, right?

One night in the last year, he got out of bed and I figured he was just doing his night-eating thing, and I went back to sleep.  A couple of minutes later, I hear the door open and then the unmistakable sound of a metal spoon clanking against a cereal bowl.  I was so groggy and I remember thinking,"this is a very bad idea...is he really attempting to eat cereal in bed ?" I feel back asleep without saying anything, though.

Some amount of time later, I hear more spoon/bowl clanking, then him gasp loudly and jump out of bed. The man had fallen asleep mid-cereal eating and then spilled it all over his side of the bed.  He didn't say anything, but I heard him cleaning things up, trying to be quiet.  He laid towels down on the bed and went back to sleep eventually. 

The next morning, we were talking and I asked him,"So, had some trouble with some cereal last night?" 

 And we both burst out laughing.

I love that kooky cereal-in-bed-eater. And he loves me.

 And man, do I love the family we've created together.

I am just so grateful to be married to such a loving, supportive, kind man and father.   He's one of the good ones, and sometimes, I still can't believe he chooses me, day after day.

You can more pictures from this super fun 'Wreck the Dress' photo shoot we did here.

Beards Are In

Liam has been really into beards lately and keeps talking about his beard.  

So, I spent a little time making his dream come true.

I think, somehow, it suits him.